When the world gives you almost-rotten tomatoes, make pasta sauce.

We have had a slew of not-so-slowly-rotting tomatoes on our cupboard for a few days.  (The thing about buying your produce super fresh at the farmer's market... it goes rotten in about 45 seconds.)  Now, I have made plenty of pasta sauces in my day, with varying degrees of success, but never one made straight from the tomatoes.  I have always used canned toms.  (I KNOW, whole fooders, I KNOW.) 

Pinterest, teach me.

Healthy Tomato Sauce from WholeLiving.com.  This recipe actually does call for canned toms, but the other ingredients looked pretty straightforward aaaaaaaand we happened to everything in the house already aaaaaaaaaand I figured I knew enough about cooking to kind of figure it out as we went along.  We'll see.

BONUS!  I had a package of super tasty-looking pasta, bought from Eataly on a recent vacay to NYC, with which I wanted to do something Pinteresting.

Almost-rotten tomatoes?  Gourmet pasta?  The universe was practically begging me to carb binge.

FIRST!  Chop a crapload of onions.  I probably overdid it per the proportions in the recipe, but I don't care because I love me some onions.

SECOND!  Add a crapload of garlic.  I like to chop my garlic pretty chunky because I love garlic so much I want to see it while I'm eating it, so I can properly thank it for being so delicious.  I went with slices this time because it just seemed like the right thing to do.  I threw in about half a dozen cloves.  Don't judge me.

THIRD!  Drown it in olive oil and simmer till the onions/garlic are dead dead dead.

FOURTHLY!  Dump in a bunch of oregano and basil flakes.  I know, whole fooders, fresh chopped  herbs would be best, but you gotta work with what you've got.  (THE GUILT, WHOLE FOODERS, THE GUILT!)  And anyway, Pinterest hasn't taught me how to grow herbs yet.  (Note: If you let Bubs help shake in the seasoning, you will get it all! over! your kitchen.)

FIFTH!  Chop, into chunky chunks, a crapload of almost-rotten tomatoes.  We had about a dozen.

SIXTH!  Simmer the crap outta all this.  Stir whenever you remember you have something on the stove.  So about twice.  I was waiting for the SECRET INGREDIENT to arrive from the grocery store, so it simmered for about an hour, maybe an hour and a half.

AND THEN!  Take a break to watch the Olympics with Sweet Pea.

Some dude from somewhere won a medal for something.
It was emotional.

TIME FOR THE SECRET INGREDIENT!  When the grocery shopper returns from the grocery store with your secret ingredient, add about half a cup of red wine.  We're a dry household, so I have no idea what to do with the rest of the bottle of wine, but I know someone who does!  (I'm looking at you, Pinterest.)

SEVENTH!  Not that the recipe told me to do this or anything, but I threw in sliced zuchinni and mushrooms.

LASTLY!  Simmer down now.  For another half hour or so, until the veggies are soft, but not too soft, ifyouknowhatI'msaying.

AND THEN SHOVE IT INTO YOUR FACE!  Smother in parm first, of course.

It was delish, if I say so myself.  It needed salt and probably could have used a little more in the herb/seasoning department.  But even so, those almost-rotten tomatoes made a tasty, light sauce for my fancy pants pasta.


And that's how you Pinterest.